Bitachon and The Strength To Do What's Right

Keeping Shabbos as a Factory Employee: My Father’s Father

My Zaidy, Moshe Sonnenschein, moved to Montreal after World War II. An expert tailor, he found employment in a local factory. More than half of the 120 workers were Jewish, many of them Holocaust survivors.

Zaidy began working on a Wednesday. His supervisor was quickly impressed by his ability to fix or remake any garment, and gave him all the work that others were not capable of doing.

At 3:00 PM on that first Friday in February, Zaidy packed up his things and prepared to leave.

When the Jewish lady on the next table saw this, she asked him, “Where are you going?”

“What do you mean ‘Where am I going?’” Zaidy answed. “It will soon be Shabbos! I am going home!”

“At least leave through the side door,” the woman suggested. “Maybe no one will notice.”

But Zaidy refused. “Why should I sneak out through the side door?” Zaidy asked. “I didn’t steal anything! I’ll go out through the same door I came into this morning!”

As Zaidy was leaving, his supervisor asked him where he was going. When Zaidy told him he was headed home for Shabbos, the supervisor only asked - “Will you be back on Monday? Just make sure you come back on Monday morning!”

Zaidy worked in that factory for 28 years.  No one ever gave him a hard time about leaving early for Shabbos, and whenever there was an office party, all the food was kosher so that he would be able to eat!

Keeping Shabbos as Owner of a Small Business: My Mother’s Father

My other Zaidy, Herman Moskowitz, owned a children’s clothing shop in the Bronx. It was the 1960s, and most of the stores in the area - even the Jewish ones - took advantage of the busy shopping day on Saturdays by keeping their stores open for business.

My Zaidy, however, always closed his shop for Shabbos.

One Sunday morning in the bustling shopping month of December, my Zaidy came to open his store. The owner of the neighboring shop, also a Jew, began to poke fun at him for not working on Shabbos.

“The streets were packed yesterday, Herman! There were so many shoppers,” the man told Zaidy. “You don’t know what you missed!”

Replied my Zaidy, “No, my friend. You  don’t know what YOU missed!”

Zaidy had Bitachon. He firmly believed that if you keep Shabbos, you will make whatever living Hashem has planned for you, even if you miss the busy Saturday shopping day!

Shabbos: A Testament to Creation

On the holiday of Simchas Torah we complete the Torah and immediately start again from the beginning: Bereishis, the creation of the world.

God created the world in six days, and on the seventh day He rested. By refraining from creative work on Shabbos, we testify that Hashem created the world and continues to run the world to this day.

It is tempting to believe that by working seven days a week we can make more money than by working only six. Some people feel that more or better jobs may be open to them if they are flexible enough to work on Saturday.

The reality is that God created this world, and God runs this world.

How much money you make and which job you get are determined by God alone. You do your part (keep the Torah) and let Hashem take care of the rest!

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You're Fired! Bitachon in Times of Challenge

The Challenge

The predominantly Jewish neighborhood was quickly changing. Mr. Sam Levenson realized that the was no longer a demand for kosher meat in the area. Sadly, he was forced to close his butcher shop.

At the age of 60, Mr. Levenson found himself searching not only for a new job, but a new career entirely. Since he knew the city, and he knew how to drive, he decided to seek employment as a cab driver. He figured that at least inside of his cab, he would be his own boss.

He began his new job just before the Jewish month of Tishrei. As an observant Jew, he informed his boss that he would not be working on the Jewish Holidays.

His new boss was a Jew as well. Though he was neither observant nor well-educated in Jewish matters, he knew enough to let Mr. Levenson take days off for the well-known holidays of Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippur.

That year, the first night of Succos was on a Sunday night, just like this year. On Friday, Mr. Levenson told his boss that he would not be coming into work on Monday and Tuesday due to the holiday of Succos.

Though the boss had heard of Rosh Hashanna and Yom Kippur, he was not familiar with the holiday of Succos. He promptly replied that if Mr. Levenson did not report for work on Monday morning, he should not even bother coming in on Wednesday.

Lesson #1: Bitachon and the Courage to Stand Up for What is Right

It is incredibly difficult to hold onto what is true in the face of such a challenge.

Mr. Levenson was threatened with the immediate loss of his entire livelihood. Yet he knew that obeying his Creator was his first priority. He exhibited Bitachon by keeping the mitzvos even though it appeared that this would cause him harm.

I have heard people say, “I can’t miss work on Yom Tov because … ”

• I will lose my job
• My boss won’t like it
• I will lose money

We can all learn from the courageous behavior of Mr. Levenson! He had Bitachon! He believed that if God wanted him to work, then he would. And if God decreed for him to lose his job, then that’s what would be. His human contribution was just to do what was right: in this case, not to work on Yom Tov. The rest was up to Hashem.

The End of the Story

Mr. Levenson celebrated Succos with his family on Monday and Tuesday, trying not to dwell over his lost job. He went into work on Wednesday, figuring that he had nothing to lose. Maybe his boss would change his mind and let him continue to work after all.

His boss saw him and came right over to him. Mr. Levenson was sure the he was fired for good.

“Mr. Levenson,” began the boss, “as long as you work for me, you don’t ever have to worry about taking off for the Jewish Holidays again!”

Needless to say, Mr. Levenson was quite shocked by the change in attitude! As it turned out, this about-face was the result of an unusual and unexpected chain of events.

“This past Sunday,” continued Mr. Levenson’s boss, “my father passed away. I don’t know many Jewish laws, but I do know that children sit shiva after the passing of a parent. I prepared to sit shiva for my father, but much to my surprise, the Rabbi told me that since Monday was the Jewish Holiday of Succos, there would be no shiva.

“I now know that you were telling the truth, and not just trying to wheedle another vacation day out of me. I respect you, and I will never give you a hard time about your holidays ever again!”

Mr. Levenson worked for that taxi company for 10 years, and he never had to worry about working on the Jewish Holdiays again!

Lesson #2: Nothing is Beyond God’s Ability

At times, a person finds himself in a hopeless situation. All seems lost, and there just doesn’t appear to be any way out. Often, people just give up.

Part of Bitachon is to realize that Hashem is capable of doing anything. There is no problem that is too difficult for Him to solve, should He deem it appropriate. Even when we don’t see any favorable solution, we must not give up!

Mr. Levenson’s situation appeared to be pretty bleak. It really didn’t seem likely, or even possible, that his boss would change his mind.

Despite the grim circumstance, Mr. Levenson did the only effort left to do in the situation: he went into work on Wednesday. He did not give up,  even though things looked bad.

And God certainly found a creative and beautiful solution to this problem!

Thank You

I would like to extend a special thank you to my Uncle David Levenson, the son of Sam Levenson, for allowing me to share this story with my readers. I have heard many wonderful and inspirational stories from my Uncle David over the years, and this is one of my all-time favorites!

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The One Thing That Makes All The Difference

3:00 AM

It is dark, both inside and out. All is quiet, except the rustle of a few leaves in the gentle night wind.

Inside the house, a figure slowly creeps up the stairs. Ever so quietly, he climbs step by step, using tiptoes so as not to wake the sleeping family.

Good or Bad?

Is this figure a hero, or is he up to no good?

From the information given, it’s impossible to know.

On first instinct, you may assume the figure is a thief. He must maintain absolute silence in order to successfully carry out his mission.

However, that figure could also be a boy. He woke up feeling unwell, and went downstairs to take a drink of water. Not wanting to wake his sleeping parents or the rest of the family, he tiptoes quietly back to his room.

The Difference: Motivation

Both “figures” performed exactly the same act. The description could represent both equally well. What is it, then, that makes the one a hero and the other a villain?

The defining factor here is the motivation. The boy’s intention was admirable: to perform the mitzvah of Kibbud Av Va'Aim (honoring parents) and the mitzvah of not waking those who are sleeping. The robber, on the other hand, had only himself in mind. He did not respect other people’s sleep - he just wanted to get away with some valuables before anyone noticed!

Bitachon and Effort: Having the Right Motive

Hashem is the Guiding Force behind everything that transpires in the world and everything that happens to me personally. This is the fundamental idea of Bitachon!

Yet, at the same time, God requires me to try my best and do what I can to fulfill my needs and achieve my goals. This is the obligation of hishtadlus, effort.

There can be two people, equally hardworking, but one has complete trust in Hashem, while the other is severely lacking in Bitachon. What sets them apart?

The answer is, of course, their motivation.

One believes that whatever Hashem has set aside for him, he will have. He works hard, but only because Hashem has commanded us to put forth appropriate effort.

The other believes that if he works hard, he will earn well. In his mind, his efforts are the cause of his success. He has left Hashem out of the picture completely. (It is also possible for a person to attribute some credit to Hashem, but most credit to his own efforts. This is still a lack of Bitachon. A person should believe that his efforts serve the purpose of fulfilling his obligation, but success or failure are completely in the hands of Hashem.)

Real Service or Lip Service?

On the other end of the spectrum, there may be two people who both say “Everything is by Hashem’s decree”, but one is righteous and the other is a fool!

The righteous man truly believes that God runs the world. The man puts forth his required effort, but places his trust in Hashem to do what is best for him.

The fool is lazy and does not want to work. “Everything is by Hashem’s decree” is just his excuse to exempt himself from doing his part.

Same refrain, totally different intent!

For God’s Sake, Give Us Life!

There are several passages which we add to the amidah prayer during the Ten Days of Repentance from Rosh Hashanna through Yom Kippur. The first is:

Remember us for life, King who desires life, and write us in the book of life for Your sake, Living God.

Of course we’re asking for life - after all, everyone wants to live! But what is “for Your sake” doing in there?

Life without God has no meaning. It is only when I live my life in a Godly fashion that my life takes on purpose.

I am asking Hashem for life not because I want to eat, drink and be merry, but rather so that I can serve Hashem.

Actions are important; intention is crucial!!

Practical Bitachon

You can turn any type of work or effort into a Bitachon moment! Just remind yourself that success and failure are determined by Hashem, and your effort is just a necessary tool, not the real cause.

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When Things Don't Go Your Way: 3 Tools for Dealing with Disappointment

Imagine this scenario:

It is Rosh Hashanna morning. You dress and feed the little ones, set the table, and head off to shul.

The shul has youth programs and even babysitting, to allow parents of any age child to participate in the services.

You are looking forward to the opportunity. After all, as a mother of young children, it is not often that you have a chance to daven in shul!

You make sure to arrive early enough to settle all the children in their respective programs. Everyone seems happy, except the baby. You remain with him for a while longer, until it is time to listen to the shofar. He seems to be okay as you slip out the door …

When you step out for a moment after shofar blowing, you meet a friend who has just come from the babysitting room. “Your baby is crying,” she informs you. “Maybe you should peek in through the glass in the door.”

Sure enough, your baby is screaming! Time to rethink. Certainly, God does not want you davening mussaf at shul while your baby screams at the babysitter.

So you retrieve your baby and other children after just a short stay at the youth programs. So much for the quiet prayers. So much for the inspirational davening!

I told you to imagine this scenario. I, on the other hand, do not have to imagine anything; this is exactly what happened to me on the second day of Rosh Hashanna this year!

How does a person deal with disappointment?

Bitachon requires me to believe that everything Hashem does is for the best. This can sometimes be tricky if you don’t know how to deal with frustration.

There are specific tools that can be used in this type of situation to help you cope with the letdown.

1. Maintain realistic expectations

   When you expect one thing and get another, you may feel frustrated or dissatisfied. Having realistic expectations does not mean expecting the worst; it means realizing that things may not go exactly as planned. When you are prepared for alternate possibilities, you are better able to adapt to the new situation.

   In the above example, I was well aware the my baby does not take fondly to babysitters. He is almost never in the care of any non-family member. He also  woke up early that morning, and I knew he would need to nap close to his regular time, shortly after the shofar blowing. It would have been foolish for me to expect him to be happy about being left with strangers when he was overtired!

   Going in with the attitude of “Wow, it would be so nice, but I know it may not really work out” rather than “This is the way it will be” made a huge difference in my level of disappointment. Sure, I would have loved to daven in shul, but at least I wasn’t crushed that I had to daven at home instead (with little people trying to get my attention the whole time!).

2. Gratitude: Focus on what went right, not what went wrong

   This one is crucial. If you maintain a positive focus, it can really keep things in perspective.

   By having gratitude for all that worked out well for me, it helped me to realize that not davening in shul was really not such a big deal in the larger picture. Here is a list of some things I am grateful for:

   • I have children to take care of.
   • I got to hear the first 30 shofar blasts in shul. This was especially important to me because my husband was blowing the shofar!
   • I got to hear shofar, daven mussaf, and stay in shul until the end of kedusha on the first day of Rosh Hashanna. Again, I valued this even more because my husband was the Chazzan on the first day!
   • If this had to happen on one of the two days of Rosh Hashanna, I was glad it worked out this way. I heard some of the Chazzan’s repetition on the day my husband was the Chazzan, and at least I made it for shofar on the day the he blew shofar!
   • I managed to daven mussaf at home, albeit not in the quietest environment.
   • The baby napped closer to schedule, so he went to sleep on time at night.

   I cannot stress enough how much this type  of attitude can help you! In any life situation, there is always something to smile about. If nothing else, you can be grateful that you are at least familiar with more pleasant situations than the one you are in!

3. Plan for the future

   Ask yourself: “What can I do differently next time to achieve a better outcome?”

   This shifts the spotlight from the undesired events and places it instead on an action plan for the future.

   Truthfully, in this particular instance, I don’t think there is anything I would change the next time! Yes, I would have loved to daven in shul, but no, I wouldn’t give up my role and responsibility as a mother to make that happen!

   I had already  done all that I could to help things along smoothly (such as leaving snacks, settling him in, even acclimating him to babysitting at shul for short periods over the previous few weeks). If it didn’t work out, it is because Hashem didn’t want it to be that way!

   However, there are many cases where we can do something to improve the odds of things working in our favor. This is part of our required hishtadlus (effort) and we certainly must not ignore this aspect.

What is your experience? Do you have an idea you would like to add to this list?

Wishing everyone a Sweet New Year and a meaningful High Holiday season!

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